March 14, 2010

So, if I understood Daniel correctly on the phone....March 14, 2010 is the day that he should be heading back to America. He has a bunch of tests he has to get done so he has to come back before his unit. Then from that point we will figure out a date I guess? Who knows, it's a miracle Daniel has a date for that. SO, HOORAY!! HOORAY!! HOORAY!!!

STOP CALLING ME A KID!

I understand that as a young teacher, you'll always get remarks about your age. It seems however, that there is this persona about what a teacher should look like and apparently how old they should be. Yes, I am younger, but I am by no means a kid. A kid in my mind is someone under the age of 18. In fact, I don't even refer to people older than 13 as kids, but as teens. I am an adult. And just because I don't have kids myself, it doesn't make me a kid. Just because I am youngER, doesn't mean I'm a kid. Just because I'm younger than YOU, doesn't make me a kid.

Ever since I entered the teaching profession, people have been commenting on my age. In fact, the first comment I received while touring a school during an interview went something like this:

Teacher: Hi, I'm So-and-So. Who are you?
Me (New Teacher): I'm Jessica Tsu, I'm interviewing here for a job.
Teacher: What!? Are we hiring high schoolers now?! (Smirks, then walks away)

And ever since then, I have gotten comments every year about my age. I've been told that ONE DAY I will be "thankful" for these types of comments, but to be honest, I don't understand how age is such a huge issue?! Honestly, I've never understood why people feel the need to comment on MY age. Go ahead and comment all you want about YOUR age, but leave me out of this. AND what bothers me more, is that I am relatively close to the same age as many of the teachers around me, but for some reason I am the one that these sassy remarks are directed towards. Who cares if I don't have kids yet? Who cares if I am younger? I went to college. I got great grades. I aced all my testing for teaching. And hey, I have enough energy to keep up with my students. AND I have extra time to spend on class work because I don't have kids...so what is the big deal and why do people mention it so often? I'm not sure. If you figure it out, let me know.

Classes, craziness, the thing I call life...

Right now I'm listening to Jack Johson's, "Better Together," the song Daniel and I danced to at our wedding. Simba is laying on the ground whining, wishing he had my food. I'm finishing some work on the computer and eating one of my favorite cereals, PB Captain Crunch, and wondering, How did it come to be eight o'clock already!? Oh wait, it's cause I had Smartboard class until 6:30. Time sure flies!

Today just flew right by too. And I can't believe it has been almost a year since Daniel left. He will be leaving his base in Afghanistan this week. Then he'll go to another base, and keep moving like that until he comes home to the good ol' USA. YAY! I'm so glad he will be home soon. Living alone is horrible. And living alone with a dog is WORSE!

I'm looking forward to the next three weeks, even though they are going to be crazy. I'm going out of town Friday for a top secret mission. Then next week I'll have a sub for half a week and I'm off to this awesome CUE Technology Conference in Palm Springs, CA. Then the following week we have CRT Testing. The weekend following CRT testing I go to Fallon for Smartboard training. *SIGH*. This Tuesday I am having the missionaries over for dinner and I'm wondering what to make. I asked them for suggestions because I hate coming up with a menu and they said they like rice. Which makes me want to make Chinese...maybe postickers, stir-fry, teriyaki chicken? OR, possibly Panda Express? LOL....I wouldn't stoop THAT low. But I am getting a little worried. OH WELL. I'll make it somehow. Maybe I'll just serve rice?

Going out of town is always hard for me because I'm BAD at unpacking my stuff...UG. Not looking forward to it or being in a car for that long...actually, I'm a bad car rider too! I just fall asleep!

Anyhow, that's the craziness going on right now. Until next time...

Crutching around....

Today was a typical day. My friend's daughter texted me wanting to walk dogs together. I willingly obliged. In fact, I enjoy walking with them. Simba and Ruffy have fun ignoring us, and we talk about random things that make me laugh and appreciate I'm no longer in Jr. High. Simba pulled hard and disobediently today so we decided that we'd break the law and let them run around for a while. It was great until a lone figure appeared out of no where. We snatched up the leashes and began running in the opposite direction. By now the sun began sinking under the horizon and the grayness started to engulf us. Simba, extra jovial tonight, pulled and tugged at his leash. I obliged and began running with him through the grass and dirt, the remains of a once beautiful golf course. To my surprise I found myself crashing down to the ground. SNAP! I heard a horrible sound come from my ankle. I couldn't move. The pain permeated from my ankle into my thigh. Laying on the ground I couldn't think about anything except for a conversation I had with Laura just last night, it was about how someone had broken their leg and they had to be helicoptered out of a camp site. I had said I would NEVER do that, I'd hop out. BUT the few seconds that led to me laying on the ground made me almost laugh. There was no way I'd be able to make it. The sharp pain radiated from beneath my heel. Eventually I made it home, Simba wouldn't let me ride him, although I tried to. And now here I am in a fake cast and crutches. I have to go to the doctors AGAIN in the morning because the xray tech wasn't in. I'm just hoping it isn't broken or torn....I hope it's just a BAD sprain.......*cross fingers*

What's been going on

Daniel will be coming home in April. WOOT! WOOT!! I will no longer be alone!! YAY! It will be a refreshing break to solitude. His unit has been preparing to come back, they will slowly turn gear in, and move base to base in a month. Then they'll be on their way home! YAY!

I've been sick. I have had a major sinus infection that turned into a horrible vocal infection and was moving into my chest. I woke-up Thursday not being able to speak. Horrible, horrible, horrible!! My mom finally convinced me to take Friday off since I couldn't talk and she didn't want me getting all my kids sick. Very true, true, true. Especially since I hate when kids come to school sick, I decided I better not be such a hypocrite and stay home. It was a good thing I did, I was exhausted and slept almost all day! I woke up at around 4pm and are some food, emailed, showered, and went back to bed. It is amazing how I could sleep forever. I feel like I'm the type of person who will never be a morning person and continually needs at least 10 hours each night. *SIGH*

All these chronic things led up to me FINALLY buying these really cool and unfortunately, expensive, air purifiers. YAY! We will see if they help me and my allergies. I think they will. My little ionic breeze helps and it's only one filtration system, the ones I bought are a 5 step filtration process!! CRAZY! So I'm excited to have clean and purified air, no dust, no dog hair, no allergens! Woot! Woot! Don't worry, I'm not putting all my eggs in a basket, I am prepared for failure or success.

My Smartboard at school is installed and I've been trained Level 1 and 2 Smart Ready! YAY! It's so much fun! I feel like I am really excelling at it as well. I feel like a sponge when I'm learning, it's so great! I love learning, but technology has been so fun for me lately. I've been trying to decide what I want to get my masters in, but I think that this year has helped me realize I want to get a masters in technology. Oh yes, more good news for school! I am also probably going to get iouches for my class!! There is a grant that gets an itouch for each student and a laptop cart with 16 laptops and 1 mac. Should be fun. Our whole fifth grade is probably going to get the itouch. HOORAY!!! =) Anyhow, it's so much fun learning how to integrate all this technology with the kids. The kids love it just as much as I do, maybe even more?

At church I've been called as the Young Women's Camp Director. I'm excited and scared all at the same time. I told Aunt Sandy and she asked me if she should congratulate me or cry with me and it made me laugh. Looking back on my childhood, I was never really that active in church for long periods in my life, but I always found my way to Girls' Camp. AND, I always LOVED it. I'm excited for Girls' Camp and I hope that I can make it a memorable experience for all the girls in my ward. It feels good to be back at church and help the youth. I feel so inspired when I am with them. They are amazing, strong, and talented! I feel very blessed to get to work with them and learn from them.

Overall, life has been good to me. I have bad days still, but I've been trying some herbal remedies that have been doing wonders. This passion flower and St. John's Wort for stress has really helped me. Now all I have to worry about it taking care of my registration citation, if only I knew what it was for. *SIGH* Will the madness ever end? I hope so. 2 months. =)

New Year's Resolutions

Every year I make new goals for the year. I've been thinking a lot about these and here's what I've come up with:

1. Get fit and eat right!

2. Get organized! Reorganize my house until it looks like one of those magazines. =)

3. Do things that will make me happy.

Hooray for the 2010! A time to make a new start (again)! Hip-hip-hooray!

Blue

I'm a wreck. I kept myself together enough for the holidays, but I haven't been feeling like myself. It's so hard with Daniel gone, all I want to do is sleep. But most the time I can't sleep and so I end up feeling like I do today-crappy. I didn't do anything exciting last night, I just got back into town and was so exhausted. I laid and laid and laid until 9am this morning. It is horrible, my head is still feeling the after affects. Anyhow, I just haven't felt like myself all year, I've been so negative, grumpy and completely irrational at times. I feel like it's time to get medicated. Bah-humbug.

Mah-Jong

Tonight was so funny. I played mah-jong (a Chinese tile game similar to rummy) for about 6 hours. At one point my mom thought she won, but she didn't and it was just so hilarious. SHe tried to take a tile and discard one, but in order to win you must have all straights or threesomes of a tile and a pair. It was so funny. My mom was pretty determined she won and didn't realize her error.

Another funny point during the night was when my grandma's feet were underneath the table. I put my feet on top of them and tapped them. She looked at my sister and was kind of freaked out, asking why she did that, then she realized it was me. hehehe.

Oh Happy Day!!!!!!!!

Today was a most awesome day! Not because I worked out my problems or anything, but because a friend's friend helped me reduce my speeding ticket to nothin! HOOORAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What a fantastic day! I also saved a kid at school. He was gushing blood and I came to his rescue. Okay, okay, it wasn't anything life threatening, but a KILLER bloody nose, shooting out like hose water! Anyhow, besides that, my day was just ok.

Following some advice...

I've received so much advice about how I should handle this weird, emotional, and sensitive situation I've been put in. AND, I've decided I'll take the road not taken. I'm going to ignore it for a while and be distant. I guess if I'm not cool enough to add as a friend on facebook, even though you've added my sister and brother, that I don't have to try when no one else does. It's some insight I received from my sister. I always try too hard. I always want people to like me. And because of that, people walk all over me and at times I let them. I've either been too nice or too opinionated. So now I'm going to be neither. I'm not going to care and I'm not going to try to be an active part in anyone's life. Why am I always the one that calls? Wait, it's cause I'm the only one that cares, not becuase everyone is busy. I am busy too even though Daniel is gone. In fact I"m more busy with church callings, new job, new grade assignment, and three classes, but I still manage to call people. Hmmm....it's a great new way to think and I should have thought of it sooner. It's not because I'm not a nice person. Nope, not it one bit. I've sacrificed and been thoughtful countless times. Now I'm going to put myself in other people's shoes and stop being that person. It should be fun. I don't have to do ANYTHING! Mwhahahaha. I'm going to test it out and see how it feels to not be the thoughful person who cares about everyones feeling and about feeling a part of things. I mean, it'll totally be out of my character, I'm generally nice to EVERYONE, even people who don't deserve it, but this time, I'm not going to be. I'm going to be the icy shoulder. I'm going to stand back from it all because more than anything I'm tired of being the only one who cares about how people are treated and wanting to change it. I'll just do like everyone else and settle it by ignoring it. Maybe it will work for me, especially since it seems to be working for everyone else. I don't even know why it bothers me so much, but it does. I'm a totally blue personality and I want everything to be out in the open and when it's all weird and uncomfortable and no one thinks there is a problem, but me, maybe I'm emotially the problem. So here goes! Here I go, I'll not care. This is me not caring: ZzzZZzzZZZzz :)