Sooo Much To Post.....Sooo Little Time.....

Chicago was great! I had such a great trip with my sis and mom. We did almost everything that could possibly be done! It was AMAZING! It makes me realize just how much I enjoy traveling! =) Completely looking forward to more trips. I'll post pictures and more stories here later.

School started this week on Monday...and I truly can't believe the week is already over! I've moved to a new school, Floyd Elementary, from Hafen Elementary. I'm also teaching 5th grade instead of 3rd and I must admit, "I LOVE IT!!!" Although I am very worried about my students, I'm thinking 5th grade is a FANTASTIC age!!! I've been busy the last few weeks preparing my classroom and I will soon have beautiful pictures to post. I'm starting the year with half of my class from Hafen. It's so fun having kids I know already. We have bonded and I feel they are really liking my class. I have such sweet kids this year, it's been a blessing. They are sooooo funny though. Today I was carrying about 20 notebooks when I went to pick my class up from lunch. Well, "T" thought it would be nice to help me, so this 3' little guy takes these notebooks out of my hands and attempts to walk with them. As he approached the line, the notebooks crashed to the floor. Luckily "I" picks them all up and helps out "T." "I" begins to ask, "Why am I carrying these books?" I of course laugh and reply that he can hand them to me. In response he scoffs and says, "I couldn't have a young lady like you carrying these down the hall!" Of course in my head I'm laughing...but really thinking, WOW! I hope these kids keep these manners and only get more and more well mannered and thoughtful as they grow.... =)

I also have the opportunity to work with a very special child, who is a kleptomaniac (sp?). It's crazy! He's already stolen from me. I feel so completely violated. But I am learning to forgive. I guess I realize, I really need to forgive this little kid if I ever expect God to forgive me for all the stupid things I've done in my life. I've been especially reflective on my life lately and I'm trying to change. I'm going back to Church. I'm getting new hobbies. I'm trying to be who I thought I'd be when I was 12. Looking at life from a 12 year old really puts things into perspective. I feel I might have been more insightful as a kid than I am now. LOL. And definitely less vain and materialistic. Regardless I am back on the path to finding myself. And the funny thing...well, I guess not funny, but interestingly enough, even though I just spent 4 hours cleaning up after my dog...I am the happiest I've been in a long time. I feel so much peace in my life and I can only hope it will begin to get better. It's like a story I once heard about life. We each are carrying a backpack through life....and every time something happens to us that is negative, we sin, we do something to someone else that is unkind, or we don't forgive, we put a different size rock in our backpack...and on the path to where we go we continue to carry them...if we don't let go and stop those things and forsake them...we will be so weighed down that we can't go any more and our lives become stagnant. I feel like I'm on the road to taking out my stones and I can finally walk forward once again. =)

Anyhow, I'm currently up too late...I've been cleaning up after my poor dog. He had an accident....somehow he ate something that did NOT agree with him and needless to say, I've been cleaning the carpet for the last 4 hours. BLAH! So good night for now....pictures to come, of everything else, not my carpet!

Congratulations Brett and Holly Hoffman!

August 15, 2009
I drove into Elko this afternoon for my friend's wedding. It made me laugh thinking about my friend Holly. Holly and I use to go to the park in the summer and practice being a "hott chick." It's silly, but we would seriously talk about what "hott" girls do and how we need to act that way so we could be the "hott chicks." Yes, I know...I was/am a DORK, but who isn't!? Anyhow, the wedding was BEAUTIFUL and Holly looked so great in her dress! She actually married Brett Hoffman. The funny thing is that they totally should have gotten together sooner, but Lisa (Holly's sister) said that Brett thought Holly was "boring" and Holly thought Brett was too "nerdy." LOL-Funny how things change after high school!

CONGRATULATIONS once again Brett and Holly!! And if you know them, make sure you congratulate them! Love you guys!

Falling down

When life hits you, it usually hits you hard. I've been doing a really good job of staying afloat since Daniel has been deployed. Really, I have. I have had minor break downs here and there, but I have kept myself together. Last week I was starting to really feel like I was making the best of this predicament....however today it just feels like it's all come down on me so hard. The realization of losing good friends who knew Daniel and hung out with him and me....they could always joke with me abotu what Daniel might do in certain situations and they missed him too, so it didn't make me feel so damn alone... BUT now they are in Maryland. And Maryland is so lucky to have them! And in the end I am alone in Nevada with my dog. And I know I'm never really ALONE....it just feels that way. I mean, I have other friends who are wonderful and who have helped me out...it's just this feeling I have...my throat is tight, the walls are falling in on me, my eyes won't stay dry, and my heart literally aches. It aches so much I don't know how I'll get through it, what I'll do...nothing. I have been doing zillions of things to keep busy and find happiness without my love...but I still feel the empty hole he has left in my heart. Life is so fair in so many ways, and I'm not complaining...I guess I'm just begging the Universe for something more...possibly some putty to temporarily fill this hole in my heart? Or maybe even the Earth's rotation to speed up so the next few months go by faster?? Maybe I can just develop more hobbies? I don't really know the answer...I'm at a loss. Sometimes I feel I am losing my faith....but I know it's not God's fault, in fact, I know I am suppose to learn and grow from this...but right now I have that feeling you get if you've ever fallen from a tall tree...and all the wind has been knocked out of you...and at this moment I'm just trying to catch my breath and it feels like I'll never be able to.

Dialated Eyes

WHOA!?! I went to my contact lens eye exam and they dialated my eyes...I couldn't see straight for 4 hours! I had to go relax at ROSS until I could finally see.... It was pretty funny walking around looking at things...I couldn't tell if things said small, medium, or large! I'm just glad that that's not how I see things every day and that it lasted for only a few hours.... BECAUSE THAT WAS CRAZY!

Being Lazy...

So I will post some pictures up here eventually. I'm soooo tired and need to get to bed. Tomorrow I need to get going early and prepare my classroom for school to start. I am also meeting my cousin's family for Dim Sum!! Oh how I love me some Dim Sum!! YUM! YUM! YUM!!

I am really excited for Wednesday....I get to pick up my new glasses!! I splurged and got these OH SO CUTE Coach frames. All of the other frames looked SO SCARY on me, so I was forced to get these. =) I will finally have glasses that I like and will wear! YAY for being able to see!!

Losing Patience?

I thought that as time passed we are suppose to learn patience? I don't quite understand it. I feel that as I'm getting older I am not getting more patient, that I'm getting more IMPATIENT and IRRITABLE. I don't know if anyone else experiences this, but geez, I am having a hard time controlling my thoughts....they are so sarcastic and irritated. However, my trip to Chicago did put me in a pretty good mood....I need to find some quiet place to enjoy and get a grip on my slowly sliding patience....