Thoughts....

Right now I'm so conflicted. In fact I'm sitting in tears wondering how come the world is full of selfish people? At first I thought, maybe I am too much of an idealist. But as I was preparing a lesson for church tomorrow I couldn't help but think about this situation, I am right. In fact I've put myself in her situation over and over and have concluded that if Daniel's mom or dad had a surprise visit into town and we had a birthday party or something happening I would be more than happy to have them. And I know that Daniel would love to have my parent's join us as well! Maybe I am one of the rare cases of people who like their in-laws, but I hit the jackpot when I married Daniel. His family is awesome and have been so great to me...which is why I also feel so conflicted. I wouldn't ever want my family to treat Daniel the way that I want to treat her... But at the same time I know that Daniel would never act that rude and selfishly. Maybe it's youth, maybe it's just immaturity, regardless of the reason, it's still wrong and it's eating at my heart. I don't want to isolate anyone or be mean, but a part of me wants to. Another part of me wants to be nice regardless of the situation. I mean, if I can be nice to people who made fun of me in my childhood, I can certainly be kind to someone married to a loved one, right? ....maybe. Maybe I'm not ready to deal with this. Maybe I just really want my husband to be home so I can gripe to him, instead of a blog. Who knows? I certainly don't even know my own thoughts, so how can I solve a problem I didn't create? ...not sure...maybe it's not solveable. ...maybe it's doomed to pull my brother away from our family? ...maybe he wants that, which is why he's done nothing to defend our family. ....maybe he loves her family more?? ...maybe he's blinded by "love." Don't know and starting to NOT CARE. Not looking forward to Thanksgiving all of a sudden. Maybe I should stay home and hang out with Simba and eat ice cream...I have some delicious peppermint ice cream in the freezer....hmmm....good ideas... I guess I might never have answers, perhaps I will only have questions...wondering why this? Why? Clearly I'm just upset and that's why I'm having horrible thoughts racing through my mind...when will they stop!? GREAT!? More gray hair.